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IMMIGRATION HELP OR CHEATING?

Question by jasmin: IMMIGRATION HELP OR CHEATING?
This is a bit of complicated story but I would REALLY appreciate if someone with immigration knowledge can help me out on this.

I’m a Canadian citizen and I have been with my BF for 2 years. I found out from him that he came to Canada through Student Visa but that his visa expired. He was basically staying in the country illegally and he was working at a restaurant under the table to survive. Our relationship was great, and he was planning on getting his papers fixed so he can stay here.

One day all of that changed in September 2008 when he got held up in an immigration holding centre for 3 days. He got bailed out from a family friend (supposedly it cost 3000$ ). Every since then, he’s been trying to figure out what to do, and one of the things I suggested was for us to get married. He did not want to do that because he did not want me to “get involved” this way and he said that even if we get married, we need to show proof that we live together, which would be impossible since I live at home, and if my parents knew about this, they’d go psycho. More so, his parents who live in his native country, did not want to send him money to help him out, which was stressing him out more (and which I thought was strange).

He managed to get top immigration lawyers to work on his case. He has to return to his country, but they gave him the option to either “buy time” to stay in the country by claiming a refugee case (his country is in danger and it would be harmful for him to go back), or they gave him the option to leave the country immidiately and just file for immigration from there after a few months. He decided to go with the refugee claim.

Last month, May 2009, some people came to rob the restaurant he works at, and beat up him up severly. He had to go to the hospital. I went to the hospital, he was discharge. I went to his house, he was not there. For 2 weeks, he was practically unreachable, I was worried sick and I had no idea what was goin on. I was going crazy and I was very mad and confused as to why he is doing this. I thought that either 1) he owed ppl money, they beat him up and he’s trying to deal with the problem without getting me involved or 2) that he is staying with another woman.

# 2 ended up being right. He told me that he has a very good friend, who is an older woman (he’s 28, she’s 36) that is helping him out with immigration and thet he was staying over at her house all this time. I got furious. How could he not tell me? Who is this “good friend” that I dont know about? And why wouldnt he call me even if he was staying at her place? He confessed that this other woman DOES NOT EVEN KNOW ABOUT ME. I was heartbroken. I couldnt believe that he was cheating, even though he denies whole heartidly that nothing is going on.

This is what he tells me: when he got beat up, his boss assumed it was a robbery so he called the cops. My bf did not want them to find out that he was working there illegally, so he calls this “friend” and stays over at her place to “PRETEND TO LIVE AS COMMON LAW” with her. He’s telling me that she is “HELPING HIM OUT” by lending him money (!!) and by agreeing to be a common law partner for him, she can sponsor him when he leaves. I asked him if they are getting married and he said no, and then I asked him if he is PAYING her to do all this, and he said no!!!! I dont believe ONE word he is saying and I do have a gut feeling that something is going on, otherwise he wouldnt hide ME from HER. He’s been staying at her place for 2 weeks, and now he is back at his own place and he is back at his work (same work where he got beat up)! I KNOW that there is smt very very wrong with this situation.

I broke up with him 3 weeks ago, and he has been calling me non stop, showing up at my work and crying and tellin me how much he misses me. He swears on his grave that he has not cheated but he admits that he made the mistake of keepin this a secret. He says that he is in a big mess that he is trying to fix, but at the end of the day, he wants us to be together. It all sounds like BS to me.

My question is: if you are “common law” partner with someone, how can you help out with an immigration situation? I know marriage, but how plausible is common law? Is he just bullshitting me with this or will this method really work? And more so, WHO WOULD go trough all of this trouble (get involved with this without expecting compensation) just to “be nice”??? I just want to know, if this is really about immigration that he’s taking such a big risk??? Who does this??

Best answer:

Answer by Candy B
you had to come on here to hear that you mean zero to that guy

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